Going Home

                                                                              

  An inner peace, A certain place

A glancing look, A presence felt

Within these walls of broken bones

Your presence comes and makes new flesh

It's you I want and not your gifts

I've had the world and left the rest

The breath of grace has touched my face

It's built the bridge called trust and faith

I'm sitting still and holding on

My eyes and ears are fixed on you

It's all of me and nothing more

The door swung open, I'm coming in

I've found the place we all call home.

Jim

Finding your Way in a Lost World

 Life can be very confusing at times. There are certain basic requirements and demands that we all must follow along life's journey. We are all sent to various schools for prescribed periods of time. School offers structure, knowledge and hopefully the development of useful life skills. But what do we do when we get that diploma? What about the in between places of life. There are often significant periods of time when we are waiting for the next thing to happen... the job, significant relationship, moving to a new location.

  Just how am I supposed to make the right choice? What or who is meant to guide me in this world of choice and uncertainty? The Old Testament book of Proverbs is a special kind of instruction offered to our world as wisdom for life. Written by King Solomon and inspired by God these proverbs have stood the test of time and offer an amazing foundation to learn and be guided by truth.

  I have a confession to make. The first Bible that I seriously read I stole from the Air force hospital chapel at Elmendorf Air force hospital in Anchorage, Alaska. A young lady I worked with named Paula Zimmerman knew I was in trouble in my life and invited me attend the chapel with her. While the chaplain was talking I was intrigued by the Bible sitting in the pew. As I slipped out of the service I grabbed the Bible and walked out with it. I thought it would be nice to have a Bible and this seemed to me at the time a good way to get one. Probably not a good idea to violate one of the ten commandments to get a Bible but such was the state of my life at the time!

  Months later during one of my very long 16 hour shifts working at the hospital lab I brought my 'stolen' Bible to work with me. I would have long periods when the lab was not too busy and I used this time to read books. I opened the Bible and was drawn to two sections of the Bible in particular. One was the book of Proverbs and the other was the book of Psalms. Proverbs was offering me amazing insights into life through practical statements of wisdom. Psalms was offering me amazing poetry of the soul... reading my emotions and offering honesty and a spiritual connection I desperately needed.

  I was 20 years old and very much a lost soul. I had a good job. I had a good family.  But I was lost on the inside and the emptiness was killing me. I had a lot of fear in my life and I was desperately seeking for something to guide my life going forward. As I read the book of Proverbs, I was confronting truth but I needed something more. This morning as I write this I want to help you to find your way in a 'lost world'.  Many people have all the tools for success right in front of them and yet stumble in making those critical decisions and relationships that are so key in getting to the place they were meant to be in life. I want to share briefly with you a Proverb that can open a door into One key relationship that will guide you into that place of meaning and contentment we all seek after.

  Proverbs chapter 3 and verses 5 and 6, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart,  And lean not on your own understanding;  In all your ways acknowledge Him, And he will direct your paths."
  I read the entire book of Proverbs during those long nights in Anchorage, Alaska. I knew it to be true. It resonated deeply in my mind... and yet knowing that it was true offered no real transformation in my life.  It offered me some solace and some temporary peace... but I was still the same on the inside.  I needed something more and yet I had no clue what that was.  What I was in need of was relationship. I needed a relationship with the author of those powerful truths being revealed to me in scripture. I needed to open my life up to the only one worthy of my full trust and surrender.

  Do you have a sense that you are being guided in life? Do you feel the presence of a living God in your daily life? Do you know what it means to trust in God.... really? Your understanding and knowledge no matter how refined and developed will always be incomplete. There is a God who knows you better than you know yourself. Why walk alone when your creator stands ready to guide you and steer into your preferred destiny?

 A relationship with God is not as complex as we imagine. When you get to the place of humility and openness you can begin to experience the presence of God through invitation.... just opening your heart and mind in surrender.  The humble shall hear.... and be glad. We often hear things better when we stop thinking we're so smart and in control. Today, I encourage you to open yourselves up to a living and loving God who wants to guide you in life. You're not alone... at your point of need there is a loving God calling you to a place of inner peace and contentment. Let him take away that fear and uncertainty.  God is speaking and his first word to us is to trust him. There is a new kind of life that begins with a spiritual birth of trust in God. Why don't you begin your day with a simple prayer, "God, I am not sure what my future holds.... I am struggling to believe.... to trust , to hope.... but God I need something beyond myself.... someone beyond myself to help me and guide me.... help me to begin to believe.... to begin to trust you. Amen."

Praying with you;
Jim

Depth Perception: Seeing with the Heart

  On December 9th I had surgery to implant a radiation plaque into my right eye. Doctors left the radiation in place at the back of my eye for 4 days. Now several weeks later my right eye is suffering some of the effects of that radiation beyond the goal of killing the melanoma tumor. My vision is now quite poor in that eye. One of the surprising impacts on my vision is that my depth perception has been reduced.
  Depth perception is the visual ability to see in 3 dimensions and to perceive correctly the distance of an object. Shortly after returning from Birmingham I realized that my depth perception was deeply impacted by the poor vision in my right eye. Mary was driving me to a dinner date when I falsely perceived that we were about to hit something in the road.... I screamed out to Mary to avoid something that was not as it appeared! It takes binocular vision (2 eyes) to accurately perceive the distance of an object. Now with one eye's vision markedly reduced, I have to relearn how to perceive both depth perception and sensation. We all desperately need accurate vision to live in this world.... and the next.
  You might not have a physical vision problem. You might have excellent vision and not even require glasses or other assistance to see clearly. Be grateful for the ability to move around in your environment without danger or fear. Vision is a great gift and a complex physical phenomenon that requires so many things to work together perfectly to enable you to see clearly. But there is another kind of vision that we also need to be aware of. There is a spiritual vision.... a vision of the heart that can be damaged by the sin in our lives. Jesus addressed the need for a 'clean heart' that would enable us to see the matters of the heart accurately.
  In the gospel of Matthew chapter 5 and verse 8, Jesus said, "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God."  In a world of spiritual darkness and desperation there is another kind of vision we all  need.... we need to see the invisible and eternal things to get the 'depth perception' we need. There is a 4th dimension that most of us never see or perceive. It takes faith.... it takes a second birth to see into the forever reality of God. Our physical senses can't take us where we were born to live forever. We need spiritual eyes.
  There is a surgery of the heart that God performs when we come to the place of conviction of our own brokenness and need of him. Right now my physical vision has been damaged by a cancerous tumor. I am believing that God is healing the physical damage caused by that tumor and the radiation treatment designed to kill it. At the same time that my physical depth perception has been reduced my spiritual perception has been increased. I am seeing God in so many ways ..... with a depth perception of the soul. I am seeing more with my heart than I ever have.  My prayer is that I would see what God sees...feel what God feels....hear what God hears.  It's often when we're hurting in some way in our lives that we have the unique opportunity to gain compassion and concern for others beyond ourselves. It's in those moments that we can experience a vision of things previously unseen....I want to see with my heart the things that really matter. Open the eyes of my heart Lord. I want to see you.

Jim

Pursuing your Dream

  In our pursuit of our dreams it is vital that we understand the reality of process. A dream is a destination we move toward in the direction of the future. The dreamer is a person who becomes someone capable of living out the dream. No one who sets out to 'live the dream' begins with all the ingredients necessary to fulfill it. We become who we need to be as we move in the direction of our dream. A person without dreams is someone without a future. You must dream! Your humanity cries out for something more and you must respond! But what about the things that get in the way of fulfilling our dreams? How do we deal with the dream killers in our lives?

  Every dream killer is a test of the dreamers character. A dreamer is always a leader. Leaders see the future and bring others with them into the 'not yet'. However, if your character is deficient you forfeit the ability to obtain the promise of the dream. Joseph in the Old Testament book of Genesis was given an amazing dream at the age of 17. The dream showed that God was going to use him greatly in leadership in his family and nation. The dream was so great that it instilled jealousy and disbelief in his own family. Joseph was relegated to a period of slavery in Egypt. His dream seemed conquered by circumstances. But God was at work making Joseph into the man needed to deliver on the dream. Even with favor and gifting, the fulfillment of our dreams and visions for life are not an automatic reality. Many men and women of immense talent, training and intelligence never receive the ultimate fulfillment of their dream.

  Joseph had a relationship with God. This becomes apparent as we read through the Genesis account. It says repeatedly in chapter 39 that the Lord's favor was upon his life..... and thus he received blessing and increasing responsibility. Joseph has something vital to the fulfillment of his God inspired dream..... integrity. Joseph was the same whole (Holy) person on the inside and outside. His words, his lifestyle and his commitments all flowed out of a deep commitment to God.

  The reality is that we don't know who we really are on the inside till we face real temptation from the outside. In our broken and fallen world that temptation frequently appears in the sensual/sexual area. God has created us with strong desires for intimacy and love. When those desires are kept within the God given boundaries detailed in scripture we remain blessed and safe. When we step outside of marriage for sexual fulfillment we face a world of hurt, brokenness, disease and death. Joseph was given 'free reign' to lead and administer the household of his master Potiphar in Egypt. However, Potiphar's wife lusted after Joseph sexually and tried to force him to meet her desire. Joseph resisted successfully, however the spurned woman wound up falsely accusing Joseph. Joseph winds up in prison and it seems as if the dream will never happen!

  Delay is not denial in God's timing. While we are 'purpose driven', God is relationship directed. While we want to get things done, God wants to see us become. Joseph was sovereignly being directed by God to places where he could become the man who would fulfill the dream. It all comes down to relationship and trust. You are not a robot removed from the  need for intimacy with God. A man or woman only known by their achievement is not truly a success from God's perspective. 

  What priorities are relationships in your life? Are you investing time in developing your relationship skills? How is your E.Q? (Emotional intelligence). To what extent are you surrendering your circumstances to God in prayer? What might God be saying to you in this time of 'in between"?

  If you don't know where you're going, you're lost. Being lost isn't fatal except when you're not willing to admit it. Dreamers sometimes get lost on the way to where they are meant to be. Keep pursuing God and keep pursuing the dreams he has birthed in your heart and life.

Jim

The Foundation for Lasting Intimacy: Trust

  We get the pace and timing of intimacy all wrong. As the rock & media anthems blare out into our culture, "we want it all and we want it now".... The two sexiest words in the English language have nothing to do with the sexual act but they lay the ground work for sustainable relationships: RESPECT and TRUST. Doesn't sound very "sexy" does it?

  Respect implies a duality of humility and a desire to learn who the "other" really is. It's an attitude that goes way beyond judging a person by what can be seen on the surface. When you respect a person you make a major assumption that the real value lies much deeper than the visible surface. The idea of pacing in relationship applies a certain sense of the artist in getting to know others. If I respect people, I will make an effort to know them by listening, studying, embracing the difference and responding in step with a shared rhythm of pace. Lust demands immediacy, while love and intimacy demand measured and careful responses. You certainly don't respect someone when you leap to conclusions and demand someone become what you want them to be..... that is hatred without varnish.

  Trust is so fundamentally needed to develop and sustain intimacy that we could write for days on its meaning and essential qualities... but we won't. Let's cut to the core understanding. Trust is in the context of human relationships a response to honor and respect. It's a byproduct of someone who shows care, sensitivity and selflessness in relationships. Trust develops from ongoing deposits large and small of acts of love, goodness, kindness and shared joy. When trust is betrayed in a major way the relationship of intimacy is stripped down to the foundation and must be rebuilt... over time and through consistent deposits of character based acts of love. The real aroma of love is not fundamentally based on romantic imagery alone (though it helps a great deal!). When someone can be trusted and respected over time, the intimacy of conversation, emotional and sensual connection deepens to levels that last a life time. Revolving door relationships result from rushing into and depending on sexuality as glue without really first "knowing" the person in their inner selves. 
Sexual pleasure is one of life's greatest experiences but its not meant to be wasted or spoiled by selfishness or lack of respect and trust. When we go into relationships through the back door of control or impulse we miss the full extent of joy and pleasure prepared in God's timing and design. When we trust God enough and respect others enough we begin to see the blueprint of sustainable love and move beyond selfishness and abuse of others whom we say we love.

The Process of Intimacy: From the Inside Out

We our fixated on what we can see, feel, taste and touch. Our senses cry out for attention and we often become slaves of our appetites. The power of temptation to sin lies in the deception that once we satisfy our immediate desire (hunger, lust, thirst etc..) we will be at peace. Funny thing about sensual desire without the guidance and control of our inner selves (Spirit).... its NEVER satisfied.
Because of sin, our ability to control desire has been damaged beyond self repair. We need an appetite/desire SAVIOR. Our soul needs to be cleansed and reborn just as much as our Spirit. You must be born again is a command that needs to be applied in our hearts, minds, souls and bodies. If we are not yielding every dimension of ourselves we are walking relational time bombs ready to go off at the worst possible moments (often as we approach intimacy).

We live in a time when people are diagnosed as commitment phobic. Books have been written and movies scripted with titles like, "He's just not that into you".  People recognize a timing device inside of them attached to a 'soul bomb' that they desperately don't want to go off... no one wants to see themselves splattered all over someone else.... we are afraid to fail. When we look in the mirror and compare the images of who we think we are, compared to the societal "norm", we become afraid and disilllusioned.. no amount of gym workout time can ever substitute for what God can do as you receive his unconditional love. You and I were NEVER meant to live in relationships with others apart from an ongoing, vital & intimate relationship with God. If God is not first in your relational priorities, I assure you sin is crouching at the door of your life.

The process of healthy and satisfying intimacy begins on the inside and works itself outward. When your heart is at rest and satisfied in its relationship with God you are at the starting line of a great life of intimacy and love.

Isaiah 55, "Come all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost. Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not SATISFY? Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and your soul will delight in the richest of fare. Give ear and come to me; hear me, that your soul may live....  


Question for you, Is your soul alive?

You can't buy intimacy, you can't become someone else to make others love you.... intimacy begins and ends at the feet of a loving Savior..... if you're hurting today because of enslaving yourself to bread that can never satisfy you... God is NOT condemning you.... he knows about desire .... he created it and wants to give you something that will yield everlasting satisfaction and bring healing to your heart, mind, soul and body.... the road to healthy and pure intimacy can begin afresh today.... I am praying with you for healing, hope and a life of love to be yours both now and forever!


Jim

The Land Between: Surviving the Challenge of Transition

To be a follower of God is to be a pilgrim. We are all together on a journey with and toward God. He is leading us.... calling us onward in a pilgrimage of faith and transformation. The challenge of transition is most acute in the 'land between' ....from where we have been to where God is calling us.


Transition is the place of danger... and also the place where we either grow and mature or regress and falter spiritually. (See Numbers chapter 11 in the Old Testament of the Bible for the references in this short article)



When we're 'on the road' with God the issue of provision (having what we need) is always paramount in our minds. The journey from the known to the unknown is fraught with the temptations peculiar to the 'not yet' of every faith journey. Faith always grows deepest in the dark room of the unknown places God calls us to walk through. The people of Israel were slaves in a futile and hopeless land.... they were working for another king and kingdom. God was calling them out to freedom in worship and onward to a life of promise and blessing. But the journey out was hard. The challenges of moving into the future must be met head on. Let's look carefully at what must be overcome.


When God has us in transition we often find ourselves overcome by the temptation to complain. In Numbers chapter 11 and verses 4-6, we hear the people complaining about God's provision of food. God was miraculously providing "Manna" from heaven but the people grew weary of this amazing miracle. The truth is we don't like change. It takes faith and trust to move forward into the unknown of new circumstances, jobs, relationships and ministry. Everything changes when God calls us out with him to the land between.


Often our sense of identity is not wrapped around our relationship with God. Instead we identify ourselves by other markers: our work, church life, wealth, possessions, hobbies, family life and relationships. In times of transition we have to guard our hearts against an attitude of ingratitude and false expectations built on a falsely glorified past.



In verses 11-15 of Numbers 11 we see that the land between of transition is fertile ground for an emotional breakdown. Moses begins to doubt God's wisdom and faithfulness to him. He is emotionally distraught and ready to quit...borderline suicidal..... saying "Kill me now!". He begins to doubt the promise of the place where God is taking him.


Doubt and emotional turmoil are not unusual in times of transition and turmoil. They are signals of our absolute dependence upon God to fulfill his word in us, to us and through us. We simply cannot go where God is taking us without an ongoing,absolute and total surrender to the Holy Spirit. Moses felt the crushing weight of disappointment through the cries of the people... the opposing spirit of worship (complaining) was too heavy for him to bear alone. He needed shared and empowered leaders to help him take the people where God was going.


In verses 16 and 17 of Numbers 11 we see that the land between is fertile ground to receive God's provision. We need to keep our hands open to receive from God. When we're angry due to a sense of loss of control we close our fists to protect our "stuff"....symbolic sometimes of a hardened heart toward God and others. We need to pray for a spirit of contentment during times of change. We need supernatural grace to deal with the elevated stress levels we undergo when we leave the familiar to embrace the next place God has for us.


In verses 18-20 and 23 we see that God sometimes has to discipline us when we rebel and resist the path God places before us. Discipline is one way that God shows us his committed love to us as his children. Discipline can be defined as "inflicting pain for redemptive purposes". Holiness and spiritual maturity don't come automatically. It's in the wilderness that we learn to pray and depend utterly on God alone.



Question to test ourselves: Are you throwing yourself completely on God to meet your every need? (Body, Soul & Spirit)

A final challenge: Our heart is in danger in the land between!

Don't believe the deceptive lie that time heals all wounds. It does not. Over time, some people heal while others become embittered and hardened. The land between usually forces us one way or the other. The habits of the heart we develop in this space---our responses and reactions---will determine whether the land between results in spiritual life or death. Complaining and a spirit of complaining resists eviction. Complaining and trust cannot live in the same house. They are incompatible and double minded roommates.

I believe we are living in a time of forced transition of unimagined magnitude. There has never been a time of such intense and rapid change in every sector of our lives. We are all in some way leaving what we know. But not everyone who transitions will make it to the land of God's promise and provision. We are meant to learn from the lessons of the people of historical Israel. They were called to the 'land of milk and honey', but sadly few made it.

I am praying we will make the right choices necessary to make it out of the land between and into the place of God's promise. He is waiting for us and calling us forward in love.

Jim











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Identity: Finding the Real You

 Do you know who you are?  No, I am not talking about your name, your birthplace, your social security number or other pertinent facts you might be asked by a police officer if you are caught speeding on the highway. I am asking a deeper philosophical question about the core of WHO you are. In our search for meaningful lives, if we leave the fundamental question of identity unanswered, we will never get to where we were meant to be in life.

  The most difficult questions to answer in life are at their root spiritual ones. They cut to the core of the meaning of life. Why am I here? For what purpose was I born? What does it really mean to be loved? Who am I anyway?

  We develop a sense of identity by the culture and environment that we are born into. We are shaped spiritually and emotionally by the words spoken to us in our childhood. We hear things said about us, even while our own ability to speak is being formed and developed. The power of words spoken over us and to us, shapes our identity and expectations of life. Our view of ourselves and our world can either be accurate or inaccurate depending on the reliability of those given access to our minds and hearts as children.

  When we are born into a home where we are loved, nurtured and cared for in a healthy environment, we are more likely to discover who we really are. The ability to think for oneself, to discover, to explore and to know ourselves is a gift of immense value and magnitude. We must know who we really are before we can find that sense of inner contentment and peace on the inside. When you don't know who you are, you'll strive to be someone else. And in that striving we torment ourselves and ultimately hurt others as well.

  We were born for love. Jesus told us clearly that relationship and purpose are deeply intertwined. In the gospel of Matthew (ch. 22 and verses 37-40) Jesus was challenged by the religious leaders of his day to answer what was the most important moral law in life. Instead of commenting on any specific behavior, Jesus answer challenges our own views of religion and morality, Jesus said, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the greatest and most important commandment. The second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself. All the law and prophets depend on these two commandments."

  Man made religion fails to understand this absolute and fundamental truth: Life is all about relationships.... and relationships to be healthy need to be honest and permeated with unconditional love and acceptance of one another. We cannot discover who we really are until we have been loved unconditionally.

  People were born for love and we will search for it inexorably until we find what we're looking. The challenge in life is to find the real deal before the false and substitutes either kill us or injure us severely. Our soul in its striving for unconditional acceptance and love will sometimes get sucked into the lies and traps of lust and relational abuse. When we don't know the way to love, we'll get lost on the journey toward knowing who we really are.

  Fortunately for us, God in his mercy is on a rescue mission to help us find his love.... and ourselves. In an amazing display of the unconditional love and acceptance we all long for he came to us and showed us the way home. In the gospel of John he tell us , "For God so loved the world in this way: He gave his One and Only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life." The reality is none of us fully know who we are until we know on a personal level that deep and nearly unfathomable love of Jesus. (John 3:16)

  The love of the world is deeply marred by conditions, expectations and limitations. I will love you if....... The superficiality of the world's love is easily observed by the content of our media and entertainment. We are told who can or cannot be loved based on appearances: waistlines, facial features, skin colors, wealth etc..... the conditional love of the world creates a schizophrenia and uncertainty that frustrates and mars the human soul. We cannot find what we're looking for when the world keeps changing the measuring rod of who we're supposed to be.

  The beauty of grace and love brought to us in Jesus Christ is that you get to be yourself.... and still be loved. When you falter (and you will) you're still loved and fully accepted. Jesus does not toss you out with the garbage of your own failures and sins.... he goes out and gets you and brings you home. And in that love and acceptance you become who you were born to be.... and you find out who you really are. You are a son or a daughter of a loving God. Born for love.... and to be loved forever. Welcome home!

Jim

The Process of Healing

In late October during a routine eye exam I found out that I had a medium sized cancerous tumor growing in the back of my right eye. The Doctor estimates that I must have had the tumor in my eye for a long period of time, but I was not aware of it. I felt well and had excellent vision. But at some point the tumor pressed up against the retina and caused the surrounding blood vessels to bleed and I became aware that I had a serious problem. It appeared that I had 'suddenly' become ill...but in fact the cancer growing in my eye was a process...which had developed over time.

  Too often we look at both sickness and healing as sudden occurrences. As soon as I found out the seriousness of my eye condition, I wanted to get the tumor out of my eye.... I wanted to be well immediately! As I have learned though, healing is more often a process of gradual changes than it is an instantaneous reality. As a Christian, I am praying for God's healing to be manifest in my life. Many of my friends and family are praying with me. ( I am deeply grateful!) The Bible is replete with instances of instant and dramatic healing of physical illnesses. We were made by God to be whole and well and when we're not it's normal, natural and indeed 'healthy' to seek for healing by any means possible. We pray and we seek medical help in faith that God does indeed want us well. But the reality of our lives is that often healing does not come according to our plan and timetable.

  We cry out to God..... heal me! And sometimes God graciously answers our prayers quickly, if not instantly. What a grace that is! But sometimes the illness or affliction lingers and our faith can begin to waver.  Does God really hear and answer prayer? Delay often brings doubt. In my own case, the thought of having a tumor growing in the back of my eye has at times left me feeling frustrated and wanting both an easy and instant solution. I have had many prayers for healing and yet so far the tumor has not been removed. Waiting for healing and for the process that God ordains for it to take place takes both faith and patience.  Healing has three separate but seamless elements in our lives. God has made us body, soul and spirit beings. I could have the tumor removed or healed and still not be well in another dimension of my life.  Our physical bodies are just one part of our whole self! Our soul involves our inner selves.... our emotions, our minds, our will. So many people have no physical reason for being unwell, but are deeply broken in the soul....wounded on the inside and untouched by medicine or surgery.  Our spiritual selves are the deepest parts of who we are and designed and created to relate to God in the eternal realms of faith, hope and love. True wellness goes far beyond the healing of our bodies to penetrate the inner person of soul and spirit. God's greatest desire is to make us well forever through an ongoing relationship with Jesus Christ.

  God is taking me on a journey of healing and wellness. My soul and spirit are strong and full of joy and peace. My body is undergoing a process of healing that is taking time. To be perfectly honest I didn't want to step onto the pathway this is taking me. I did not want to have surgery. I did not want to have radiation placed into my eye. I was hoping that perhaps I would be healed prior to the surgical and radiation treatment. I was prayed for in that regard. And yet God is healing me in a way that involves process and relationship with people. Even as I write this the healing is ongoing and full of mystery and the unknown. The vision in my right eye is blurry. The radiation has caused the tumor to bleed.... and yet even that reality brings hope. The healing is taking place....over time and in a way that I must trust and release to God.  I don't know how God heals exactly. I just know that he does. I know why God heals.... because God is love. I choose to release the timing and methods of how God wants to work in my life to him. God is love and knowing that makes everything else going on in my life make sense. I am not trusting in my circumstances. I am not ultimately even trusting in the medical interventions taking place on my behalf. My ultimate trust is in the character and person of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. He is so good!

  Even as I write this I have a deep and abiding peace on the inside. My soul and my spirit have been healed. My body is being healed by his grace and love. I'm walking with the healer in a life I would not trade for anything. I encourage you to allow God to heal you as well in a journey of faith and wonder. I choose to enjoy the journey no matter where it takes me.... for my eyes are fixed and focused on the Lord of the journey.

Jim

The Journey of Faith

  One of the life's greatest ongoing challenges is to have the proper sense of direction and purpose for every stage of life. It's not just the young who feel the stress of answering the questions, "So, what do you do?", "Where are you going?", "What's your purpose?", "What are you living for?"

Life is a series of passages and destinations. What we believe to be our ultimate destination is often just a transit station on the way to somewhere else. People are pilgrims. Our journey in life is meant to have guidance and direction that brings an inner sense of completion and satisfaction. Human beings are created by God to walk with him in an amazing adventure of satisfying relationship and accomplishments inspired by love. But why do we get lost so often?

At birth our inner spiritual antenna (our inner person) is broken. We bear an image of our creator marred by original sin (think Adam & Eve). Our whole sense of who we are: our desires, gifting, sense of self etc.. is dependent on the influence of family and friends. Those with stable home influences and friends often develop a healthier understanding of direction and purpose in life. When we are born into chaos we suffer serious consequences. Behind the scenes, God is not absent but working in and out of circumstances to bring us back to himself (redeem us).

We were created with a deep need to know and love God. Our sin (moral failure) has deeply affected our ability to hear God's voice clearly. At times we sense our need for him. Loneliness, depression, fear, anxiety and confusion are often a clarion call that something is not right...something is indeed missing. No one is immune from inner turmoil. The rich suffer equally with the poor from spiritual emptiness and struggle. No matter where we are on the planet, we're searching for our real home.... for a love that can only be fully known in Jesus Christ.

Scripture proclaims our worth and value in stark and striking terms, "For it was you (God) who created my inner person, you knit me together in my mother's womb. I will praise you because I have been remarkably and wonderfully made. Your works are wonderful, and I know this very well." You are not a mistake. There is nothing random about your life. Both your successes & failures have a purpose...to draw you closer to the one who created you. Psalm 139 goes on to declare, "Your eyes saw me when I was formless, all my days were written in your book and planned before a single one of them began."

Prayer is meant to be conversational and not an exercise in begging. God put you on the planet and he knows you are in desperate need of his voice and help. But the key to finding direction in a lost world is not primarily based on telling God what you need and desire. The greatest acts of intimacy are always born of listening. Listening implies trust. Listening implies respect. Listening implies rest. And listening allows for love to deepen. It's not about getting what you want anymore. It's all about knowing your lover more. The God of the Bible loves people. Jesus loves you....right now. Listen for his voice above all others.

Even in the midst of our sin, brokenness, imperfection.... our lostness..... God came.... to bring us back home....with him.
A self centered and self directed life is a very wide and confusing road. It's a crowded and yet lonely road. The way to God is narrow....not because God is narrow.... no far from it. God's road is narrow because it's a two lane path. Room for you and him. He is calling you to walk with him in a unique and meaningful way. He wants to place his arm around you and whisper in your ear, "This is the way, walk with me." Every pilgrim has a unique pathway but the same Savior and God. The tyranny of comparison and jealousy is erased when we finally realize just how profound and precious God's love is. He's crafted a pathway of intimacy for you and him.

Jesus is the way, the truth and the life. If you're lost.... if you're seeking direction, purpose & meaning in this journey we call life....it's time to be still and listen for the voice who will not only make a way for you....... He will be your way in a lost world.

Jim

Failing Forward

  Failure. It's a word we dread. We don't want to confront it, talk about it or be defined by it. But failure is a reality we will all experience on our journey of life. How we respond to failure will in many ways define how we respond to its counterpart: Success. Failure is an inability to perform to an expected outcome.... at its root it is a fracturing of who we are ....under stress. We break down and we are unable to complete what we are assigned, called to or expected to achieve. To fail at something we deeply desire leaves us feeling broken at every level: relationally, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

  To achieve, to attain and to complete is a very human reality and desire. We don't exist to survive....we exist to create, to build, to relate and to change our world for good. But along life's journey we don't always get to where we want to go, when we want to get there and with whom we would like to travel. We are not as in control as we would like!

   Our deepest human need is relational. When we have satisfying, intimate and meaningful human relationships we have inward peace. When we FAIL in our relationships, our soul suffers an almost inconceivable level of pain and discomfort. We were born for love and not hatred. When things don't go well in our relationships, it can begin a series of responses and reactions that only confuses the sense of direction and purpose in our lives.

  Peter was one of Jesus closest and most trusted friends. Peter was a risk taker.... a leader whom others admired and respected. But Peter was deeply flawed on the inside.  Peter achieved much due to his boldness and willingness to literally 'get out of the boat'. But boldness is no subtitute for knowing our places of weakness and vulnerability. Jesus knew where the 'stress points' were in Peter's character. He loved Peter so much that he warned him in advance of Peter's greatest failure in life.  At the time of Jesus greatest need for support relationally, Peter denied knowing Jesus. Peter remembered the warning too late and failed his Lord.... and his friend. Later, Peter was restored to relationship with Jesus because he knew deep within there was nowhere else to go with his failure.  Peter failed forward in the direction of relationship. He fell back in love with the Jesus who came looking for where he knew he could find him....fishing. We were made to do certain things in life. We are shaped, formed and prepared to accomplish 'certain' things in this life (See Ephesians chapter 2 vs 8). But we are not meant to do them alone....or for our self aggrandizement or glory. Everthing we do well is meant to reflect well upon him who made all things and called them good. When we falter, when we fail, when we deny and when we betray, there is a God of love who proves his great mercy and love by taking us back into relationship.  The cross upon which our Savior died is proof for every one of us that failure need not be final. We can be restored back to relationship.  Peter's great denial did not mean that Jesus would deny him....instead Peter became what his name called him to be the great rock of testimony..... Jesus saves, Jesus forgives, Jesus restores.

  In contrast to Peter's restoration is the life of Judas.  Judas was also one of Jesus closest confidantes. He walked with Jesus during all of his active ministry. He saw the miracles and the amazing love of Jesus at work on a daily basis. He walked with Jesus  and knew him intimately. But like Peter, Judas was deeply flawed on the inside. Judas had an agenda that was unspoken but ever present. Judas wanted to WIN at all costs. Judas had a destiny in mind for himself. He was tired of 'taking it' from the Man (Rome) and wanted to turn the tables on his oppressors. He wanted it all.... and he wanted it RIGHT NOW. He admired Jesus the revolutionary, but was deeply concerned about his heart for the poor and the broken. It would cost too much to care for all the destitute.  Judas wanted to make sure he 'got his share' and finally grew sick of all the talk of a cross. If Jesus wasn't going to get aggressive with his agenda perhaps he could sell out and at least get something from all his 'devotion' and effort on Jesus behalf.

  30 pieces of silver later, Judas woke up and realized that money would not satisfy him. He threw the blood money away but alas fell backwards in failure. He fell on top of the lie that he could not be restored to Jesus. He forgot that the cross was meant for even the worst sinners.... those who would ultimately deny and betray him.  Judas like all of us failed miserably at a crucial point in his life but unlike Peter, Judas fell backwards upon himself instead of in the direction of grace, mercy and forgiveness....forward facing Jesus.

  Have you failed?  All of us will at one point or another in life will fail miserably. Perhaps right now you have deep regrets because of broken relationships.  I urge you to fall forward into the embrace of a God who won't just forgive you... he will restore, use you and ultimately fulfill his purpose for your life.... don't give up. Let his love cover your broken places.  He's calling you back to himself...back to relationship....back to your destiny.  Don't give up, fail forward.

Jim

Running the Right Pace for Life

  For the last several months I have been preparing and planning to run the First Light Half Marathon in Mobile. When I found out I had a melanoma tumor in my eye needing surgery, I had to cut back my running and adjust my plans. At first I thought I might not run at all. Jeri Stroade, my All Nations Community Church teammate, suggested that I consider 'pacing' her for the second half of the race. Since our church had volunteered to serve at a water stop at the 7.2 mile marker it made it easy for me to consider jumping into the race at that point.

  Jeri had never run a half marathon before. She had been training with my son Joshua and our mutual friend Carrie Tucker. Running 13.1 miles is hard work! Knowing how to run the right pace is very difficult. Running, like life, demands we make critical decisions regarding how 'fast' we run and how we balance the demands put upon us by our responsibilities. Life is more like a marathon than a sprint and we need to make good decisions about how we 'run our race'.

  In order for me to really be of help in Jeri's half marathon I needed to really listen to her. What was the pace that Jeri wanted to run? How did Jeri want me to encourage her? We all receive and understand encouragement differently. Jeri was very clear and comfortable in telling me how to encourage her. I ran the last half of the marathon beside Jeri listening and watching her carefully for what she needed. Our strides matched almost perfectly. We were marching toward her goal pace with every step and at times I had to restrain myself from trying to run a different pace. To really help someone we often have to let go of our own goals and comfort zone. To march in step.... in unity with others... means leaving behind my own personal agendas, goals and priorities.

  I was amazed at how much easier it felt to run in step with Jeri during the race. There seemed to be a synergy as we communicated and ran the race together. In other half marathons I have run, I remember  feeling disconnected and mentally discouraged. There was an amazing strength having someone right beside me on the journey to the finish line.  You don't have to be running a half marathon to realize the powerful truth of the need for partnership in life. Whatever aspect of life you are challenged by, we all need others to 'run the race' with us to really make a difference in our world. The temptation to run too fast or quit before the finish line faces us all in our dangerous and challenging world. Who are you running the race of life with?  Every significant and meaningful achievement in life is born of significant and committed relationships and partnerships. Don't try to run your race alone. Search for people who would love you enough to help you find the pace you can handle. The synergy born of teamwork is found in a commitment to selflessness and the learned skill of listening and hearing those we 'run with' in life.

  Are you running the right pace for your life? We discover the answers to those questions in communities of love and faith. We need one another. If you haven't found your community yet, I encourage you to talk to God about it. You were born for love. You were born for relationship. Don't run the race of life alone!

Jim
  

Finding Satisfaction in Relationships

   

  To be loved for who you are is the most essential human need. The development and growth of intimacy in our relationships demands maturity and selflessness. It's difficult to find deeply satisfying relationships, but easy to have shallow and frustrating 'friendships'.

 Due to our own insecurities and fears we often resort to ineffective and fatal behaviors in our relationships. Perhaps one of the most fatal of all is the manifestation of a controlling spirit. True love inspires, enables and empowers freedom of choice. All true love is rooted and grounded around the ability to move forward and maintain the relationship based on freedom and trust.

When we try to take control of another persons choices in relationship, we ensure the death of any possibility of true intimacy. A spirit of control closes the human spirit and damages the soul. We were not born to be 'controlled' and manipulated....we were born for real love.

The worst form of counterfeit love and intimacy is rooted in a horrific mutation of love known as narcissism.... the pathologic love of self. The narcissist doesn't love the other... he or she seeks to smother...to suffocate....to shape the other into whatever brings the ego the greatest pleasure of the moment. The root cause of a controlling spirit is the worship of self. The controller must be satisfied above all else...above all others. The partner of a controller is a slave of whatever they want: sex, attention, adulation, conversation, money or someone to hurt deeply.

The tragic end of someone dominated by a controlling spirit is the destruction of all their relationships and ultimately themselves. When we don't allow others to be free to love or reject us.... to set up boundaries in relationships based on trust... to that extent we enslave ourselves to faux relationships based on lies and deception.

The more we attempt to squeeze others to conform to what we want....the more we dishonor them. People are made in the image of their creator who describes himself for us with three simple words, "God is love". God's image in us is honored and respected when we allow others to choose in relationship. God's great love doesn't demand a response....it wins a response through proving his love. You can't love someone you don't trust. You can't be intimate with someone who seeks to use you for his or her own selfish desires.

Intimacy demands freedom. Do you seek for deeply satisfying relationships? Begin today to set others free in your life. Stop demanding what you want and start giving who you really are... no strings .... no chains. Real love is both a choice and a gift. You can't demand it...but you can give it and receive it from a God who is true love personified.

Don't Quit!

  Ever feel like quitting? Every significant commitment to succeed in life will at one point or another face the temptation to quit before achieving it's goal. As I look back on my life I can specifically recall moments where part of me wanted to give up and another part of me wanted to hold on.

  When I was 14 years old I joined the outdoor track team as a freshman. My father and uncle were both very good runners in school and they had taken me to track meets since my early childhood. I knew I wanted to run but I had no idea how much training and pain were involved! A day or two into the season my legs hurt so badly that I could not walk down the stairwell in our home. I had to go down the steps backward to lessen the excruciating pain in my calf muscles. As I went out the door on my way to school I informed my dad that I would quit the track team that day. My dad had a very serious look on his face as he gave me this advice, "If you quit now you might regret it the rest of your life. The pain is temporary. Hang in there and you'll make it through." The pain spoke very loudly but my father's words rang true. I didn't quit and went on to run all 4 years of high school and developed a life long love of running that continues to this day. What if I would have quit?

  When I was 17 years old and fresh out of high school I signed up to join the United States Air- force. At several points during my 4 year commitment I wanted to quit. But the Air-force doesn't just let you quit. I learned through the discipline of the military a lot more about commitment and working through very hard times. After 3 years in the Air-force, I surrendered my life to the gospel of Jesus Christ. What if I had tried to quit the military before that time? I would have lost the opportunity to experience the grace and mercy of Jesus Christ meeting all my needs during some very dark days.

  When I was 34 years of age I was living in Taxila, Pakistan seeking to gain 'hands on' experience working at an eye hospital. Prior to opening the eye hospital in Gilgit, we needed experience and advice from people in Taxila who had been operating their eye hospital for decades. Our experience turned out to be less than ideal and we were not treated well by some of the staff there in Taxila.  During one long dark night of doubt I had tossed and turned unable to sleep. I woke up Mary in the middle of the night and told her I thought we should quit in our efforts to continue to establish the hospital. Mary challenged me to really pray and surrender to God. I needed to face my doubts and surrender afresh to God's strength. I needed to hold onto faith and not surrender to fear and doubt. Over time I have continued to have to face down the overwhelming desire to quit many times and in many places in life.

  What are some keys to overcoming this spirit of quit?  First we need to recognize that as human beings our soul is prone to both emotional highs and lows. There are times when we feel like we can do anything and often at the beginning of a major challenge we are 'high as a kite'. But those times of emotional exuberance and excitement do not last forever.  There are also times when we feel like we can do nothing! The key in dealing with our emotions is to recognize them but not necessarily surrender to them.  There are many reasons why our emotions swing so much.... some of them are physical (lack of sleep, poor health, mental illness etc...) We should not ignore how we feel. We need to own our emotions but not be enslaved by them.

  When we are feeling overwhelmed by our commitments we need to recognize that God calls us to himself in relationship as a way to share our burdens with him. Jesus said this, "Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light." (Matthew 11:28) When you surrender your commitments to God in prayer, you enable a supernatural strength to be activated in your life. The temptation to quit doesn't evaporate but there is a new found internal strength available to those who simply ask for it in faith.

  Along with the unique important empowerment of strength we can receive from God, there is also tremendous help available from people who love us and are called to help us in life. We need help in the journey of life from others who can help us refute the temptation to quit before we achieve our destiny.
  Hebrews chapter 12 offers us some sage advice about the importance of faith and endurance in achievement. In verse 1 we read, "Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God."

  Our modern society is shaped by the message that more is better and now is the time. The concept of waiting for fulfillment and enduring suffering to yield a higher call is not something we are comfortable with. We want it all and we want it now! However, the culture of the kingdom of God calls for the surrender of the temporary to obtain the forever. If we are to overcome the spirit of quit we must recognize that the truly valuable things in life are never truly easily obtained. The next time you face the temptation to quit think hard and long before doing so. You might miss what you really want in the temptation to escape temporary pain. Before we arrive at our God ordained destiny you can be assured you must overcome the temptation to quit. You need God's help. You need the help of committed friends. You need to understand that pain and discomfort are part of the cost of getting to where you really want to go.  Count the cost and move in the direction of your destiny! Don't quit.

Jim

Pray it Anyway

  Had an encouraging time of prayer with the Liberty Church family in Pensacola last night (www.libertychurch.net). We spent about an hour praying about various aspects of our lives. Before we began to pray Pastor Buford Lipscomb encouraged us from Daniel chapter 10 to persist in prayer even when it seems like nothing is happening. To talk to God about our problems takes faith. We can't see God .... and often we feel as if we're not being heard. The reality of our human condition is we often pray with more sincerity and fervency when we are in crisis. And when we are in crisis we would prefer our requests be handled on a 'priority' basis. But God's sense of timing is not necessarily ours. There are many factors that have to come into play for us to get our prayers answered.

 Daniel was a prophet of God.  Daniel had every reason to expect that God would hear him and take his prayers seriously. But there is an unseen realm of spiritual reality that impacts our prayers. God is not deaf and he's not too busy to attend to your deepest heart needs. Listen in to an amazing vision and angelic encounter that Daniel had in response to his prayers and fasting.
  "I lifted up my eyes and looked, and behold a man clothed in linen, with a belt of fine gold from Uphaz around his waist. His body was like beryl, his face like the appearance of lightning, his eyes like flaming torches, his arms and legs like the gleam of burnished bronze, and the sound of his words like the sound of a multitude. And I, Daniel, alone saw the vision, but a great trembling fell upon them, and they fled to hide themselves.  So I was left alone and saw the great vision, and no strength was left in me. My radiant appearance was fearfully changed, and I retained no strength. Then I heard the sound of his words, I fell on my face in deep sleep with my face to the ground.

And behold, a hand touched me and set me trembling on my hands and knees. And he said to me, "O Daniel,  man greatly loved, understand the words that I speak to you, and stand upright, for now I have been sent to you." And when he had spoken this word to me, I stood up trembling. Then he said to me, "Fear not, Daniel for from the first day that you set your heart to understand and humbled yourself before your God, your words have been heard, and I have come because of your words. The prince of the kingdom of Persia withstood me twenty-one days, but Michael, one of the chief princes, came to help me, for I was left there with the kings of Persia, and came to make you understand what is to happen to your people in the latter days."

 Daniel was seeking answers from God about what was happening in his world... and what was going to happen to the people he was called to serve and love. God heard Daniel.... from the first day he prayed, God began the process of answering...but there was a delay. There is a spiritual battle going on in our world and our faith needs both endurance and patience to gain the victory in this life. The things that you pray about aren't always answered in the way that you desire... and when you desire them, but God hears your words..... he hears your heart and is at work doing what is best for you and for the world that you live in.

 Are you frustrated and discouraged? Have you stopped praying?  Have you stopped hoping? Be assured that God hears you.... that he loves you and that he will do the right thing in response to your crying out to him.  That prayer you've almost given up on saying..... pray it anyway. And watch God do the right thing, at the right time, for you and those you love.

Jim
  

Preparing for the Tests of Life

  Have you ever had the feeling that something very difficult was coming your way? There is this unusual sense of anxiety and uncertainty that is pressing in on your soul. You don't know what it is.... you can't say for sure what is happening but you just know you are about to be tested in a very deep and profound way.

  Is there a way we can be prepared for the trials, tragedies and temptations of real life?  I live next door to the University of South Alabama. The students who excel live disciplined lives of study and activity based on their desire to succeed. They find the balance between work, relationships and academics. Put simply, they are prepared.  However, the tests of the 'real world' are often less obvious and don't always come with warning signs like "Warning! Major Test ahead, GET READY!" Most of our warning systems are internal and too easy for the faithless soul to ignore or downplay as insignificant.

  In the gospel of Luke chapter 22 we have amazing insight from Jesus of how to prepare for life's greatest trials and difficulties. Jesus had developed the discipline of prayer. He took time to open up to the Father about what was going on in his mind and heart. Let's take a look at the 'heart preparation' that takes place in communion with God.  (Luke 22:39.....) "And he came out and went, as was his custom to the Mount of Olives, and the disciples followed him.  And when he came to the place, he said to them, "Pray that you may not enter into temptation."  And he withdrew from them about a stone's throw, and knelt down and prayed, saying, "Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me.  Nevertheless,  not my will, but yours, be done."  And there appeared to him an angel from heaven, strengthening him.  And being in agony he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat became like great drops of blood falling down to the ground."

  Jesus was about to face the gravest test of his earthly life. Within minutes he would face the test of betrayal of one of his closest friends. Shortly thereafter he would face the test of rejection and abandonment of another of his closest friends. Inside of his soul everything was screaming to quit.... to abandon his life's purpose. Any resemblance of inner strength was literally draining out of his body. He had no recourse other than to connect with his Father in heaven in prayer.  God was near and answered in a miraculous way.... sending an angel to deliver special strength to endure the trial of body, soul and spirit.  His example is our guide to how we too must endure life's battles.

  Sadly, those closest to Jesus ( us included) often miss the call to prayerful dependence on our Father. As Jesus ended his prayer, we see the disciples failure, "And when he rose from prayer, he came to the disciples and found them sleeping for sorrow, and he said to them, "Why are you sleeping?  Rise and pray that you may not enter into temptation."

  I don't know about you, but I've been there......overcome by worry, fear, sadness and depression. I just want to sleep.... turn out the lights and pretend that what I'm facing will just go away.  Trials don't disappear because we want them to. Trials often linger and haunt us....unless and until we get down on our knees and into the place of surrendered prayer to a God who loves us enough to hear our sincere and honest conversation.... "the earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and wonderful results."

  You are either in a trial, headed towards one, or just coming out of one. The wise person prepares for the tests of life.... and draws near in prayer to a God whose presence is more than enough to take us through and bring us to a place of deep love, hope and trust in him.  Are you prepared?

Jim